Wellness Pearls

10 February 2014

Worry is a Choice

Worry is a Choice
Worry: wor·ry ˈwərē/ old English- to strangulate

To worry is to feel troubled and uneasy, true fear is a gift, unwarranted fear is a curse and misuse of imagination. —Gavin De Becker, author the Gift of Fear

fearAn excessive degree of worry impacts our health and well-being. Many of us latch onto some imagined catastrophic future that never comes. Learn the difference between fear and worry and how to banish worry from our lives. Fear is an energizing response–it causes our bodies to take action even without our awareness. Gavin De Becker, an expert on predicting risk, assures us that there are 2 rules about fear which may help us reduce the worry stronghold:

  1. If you fear something, there is solid evidence it is not happening. Fear brings up powerful intuitive predictions of what might happen next. We don’t fear what is happening now, only what will happen next.
  2. What you fear is rarely what you think you fear, its what is linked to it. For example, fear of public speaking is linked to fear of incompetence, our loss of identity and worthiness as a person.

True fear is an unemotional survival instinct and sounds only in the presence of real danger. It is the alarm bell to our intuition. Worry is a drain, an emotion, a choice expressed as anxiety.

Some corrosive uses of worry:

  • We believe it will stop something from happening (we tend to take action on those things that are likely to occur);
  • It is a way to avoid change;
  • It helps us avoid admitting powerlessness;
  • It can perversely make us feel connected to others;
  • It can be protective against future disappointment (worry about not achieving goals, then we won’t feel as bad when we fail).

Many of us allow worry to take over our lives, but you will be notified with accurate, intuitive signals if something is worthy of your attention. The remedy? When you feel true fear, listen, if not, don’t manufacture it. It is hard for us to live our lives with intention when we are wracked in worry. For those of us who are working hard to live flourishing lives, worry can and must be banished.

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